Our immediate family gathered around a seaside table enjoying good food, beautiful sunshine and each other’s company. It was an ordinary, but special moment to treasure. Everyone was doing well, hopeful for their future, generous and kind with each other. I smiled inside – I felt proud of our young adult children - and revelled in their current satisfaction with life, as mothers do. 

It was special because it is so rarely this way. Usually someone is going through a rough patch or the harmony between us is not so strong. Life is like that, a constant series of ups and downs. What we do with this rhythm is so important. We have tried to help our children be resilient, to accept what life throws at them and learn from it, integrating that wisdom into their lives for the future. I saw a heartening glimpse of that reality on this occasion.

One ‘child’ enquired what aspirations I had for them as they grew up. Whereas my expectations have adjusted over time, the basics remain consistent:

• To find out who they are and be true to that. (Career-wise we have an electrician, a farm manager and a youth/aid worker!)
• To change the world in positive ways.
• To love one another and those around them.
• To love God and follow their calling.
• To be satisfied with their lives.

As a Community Chaplain, I now extend my heart to all those who seek nurture, especially in tough times. I go easy on the God factor, although I believe this is foundational to integrating life well. Creating groups where people can meet and foster ongoing friendships is now a key focus. Kindness, respect and inclusion are core values of these diverse groups. You are invited to come along, or encourage someone else who may benefit from a little kindness in their lives. Submit an enquiry form to find out more details.

我們陪著近親一起圍坐在海邊擺設的桌子，一邊欣賞美食，一邊享受陽光和共聚的溫罄。這是平凡的，但值得珍惜的一段特別時光。我們各人都健康，充滿未來的希望并無私地互愛。我的內心微笑著 — 我為這些年青的成年子女感到驕傲，并像一般母親般，見到他們生活滿足而感到鼓舞。
 
這會子是特別的，因為不常有。通常總有人不如意或感情不甚和諧的。生活就是如此，它經常具波動性的,迎合這節奏的方法極為重要。我們嘗試幫助子女從新振作，接受逆境來領略教訓，融合這份智慧用於將來。當時的情境令我感動，覺得一線希望的實現。
 
我的‘孩子’之一問我，對他們長成後有什麼抱負。我的希冀由於歲月的磨合而給修正了，基本上卻并無變化的：
 
●讓他們找到自我，堅守誠心。（在職業而言，他們中有電工、農場管理和青年輔導員！）
●正面地改善世界。
●互愛并把愛施於他人。
●愛上神并接受祂的召喚。
●找到生活的滿足。
 
身為社區教士，我願意張開懷抱迎接你們中尋求生活滋養者，尤其是那些處於困難的人。我不著重上神因素（不滔滔說理），雖然我相信這是融入生活的基礎。我主要是創立團契，讓參與者會面和培養友誼。仁愛、尊重和包涵就是這綜合團體的中心價值。我邀請你們光臨，或鼓勵於生活上需要點善意者參與。請打電話，或依以下連接查詢。


我的希望                                           （译自Karen牧师的“I Wish")
我们陪着近亲一起围坐在海边摆设的桌子，一边欣赏美食，一边享受阳光和共聚的温罄。这是平凡的，但值得珍惜的一段特别时光。我们各人都健康，充满未来的希望并无私地互爱。我的内心微笑着 -- 我为这些年青的成年子女感到骄傲，并像一般母亲般，见到他们生活满足而感到鼓舞。 
这会子是特别的，因为不常有。通常总有人不如意或感情不甚和谐的。生活就是如此，它经常具波动性的, 迎合这节奏的方法极为重要。我们尝试帮助子女从新振作，接受逆境来领略教训，融合这份智慧用于将来。当时的情境令我感动，觉得一线希望的实现。 
我的‘孩子’之一问我，对他们长成后有什麽抱负。我的希冀由于岁月的磨合而给修正了，基本上却并无变化的∶ 

• 让他们找到自我，坚守诚心。（在职业而言，他们中有电工丶农场管理和青年辅导员！）
• 正面地改善世界。
• 互爱并把爱施于他人。
• 爱上神并接受祂的召唤。
• 找到生活的满足。

 身为社区教士，我愿意张开怀抱迎接你们中寻求生活滋养者，尤其是那些处于困难的人。我不着重上神因素（不滔滔说理），虽然我相信这是融入生活的基础。我主要是创立团契，让参与者会面和培养友谊。仁爱丶尊重和包涵就是这综合团体的中心价值。我邀请你们光临，或鼓励于生活上需要点善意者参与。请打电话，或依以下连接查询。



我们陪着近亲一起围坐在海边摆设的桌子，一边欣赏美食，一边享受阳光和共聚的温罄。这是平凡的，但值得珍惜的一段特别时光。我们各人都健康，充满未来的希望并无私地互爱。我的内心微笑着 -- 我为这些年青的成年子女感到骄傲，并像一般母亲般，见到他们生活满足而感到鼓舞。
 
这会子是特别的，因为不常有。通常总有人不如意或感情不甚和谐的。生活就是如此，它经常具波动性的, 迎合这节奏的方法极为重要。我们尝试帮助子女从新振作，接受逆境来领略教训，融合这份智慧用于将来。当时的情境令我感动，觉得一线希望的实现。
 
我的‘孩子’之一问我，对他们长成后有什麽抱负。我的希冀由于岁月的磨合而给修正了，基本上却并无变化的∶
 
●让他们找到自我，坚守诚心。（在职业而言，他们中有电工丶农场管理和青年辅导员！）
●正面地改善世界。
●互爱并把爱施于他人。
●爱上神并接受祂的召唤。
●找到生活的满足。
 
身为社区教士，我愿意张开怀抱迎接你们中寻求生活滋养者，尤其是那些处于困难的人。我不着重上神因素（不滔滔说理），虽然我相信这是融入生活的基础。我主要是创立团契，让参与者会面和培养友谊。仁爱丶尊重和包涵就是这综合团体的中心价值。我邀请你们光临，或鼓励于生活上需要点善意者参与。请打电话，或依以下连接查询。

​I am so relieved! Someone close to me has finally succeeded in finding a new job, away from a bullying boss. It’s so difficult when someone in authority decides to abuse their power over you, as it is easily assumed that those with greater power also tell the greater truth! Hence, they can block your path out, enabling ongoing abuse. This situation repeats itself over and over, from the school yard to our homes, places of employment to the nations. Bullies are amazingly good at couching their behaviour, and they hone in on vulnerability. Sometimes they appear unaware of the devastating effects of their actions, although many clearly delight in the pain they cause others. This makes my blood boil!

Intervention by authorities usually depends on evidence, or at least some credible witnesses. Our Australian culture of mateship can help here. Who do you know that is being bullied? Can you assist them directly by speaking the truth to those who have decision-making power? That makes you an everyday hero! Or you may be a source of strength for them merely by coming alongside and believing in them – being a good mate by refusing to side with the powerful. Your encouragement could give them confidence to eventually stand against the bully. Your words and actions have power too!

Are we complicit in yielding to the ‘loudest’ voices? Let us look beyond persuasive personalities to evidence-based research and a good reputation of credible service. It is also wise to weigh whether the dominant person is telling us the truth, especially when the weaker one asserts otherwise. It is important to take time to unearth the truth when peoples’ lives are at stake.
​
I like what Jesus said to his mates about leadership and power:
‘But it shall not be this way among you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant’. (The Bible, Mark 10:43).

I wrote my mum’s eulogy today. It was both pain and privilege. I learned more about my modest and private mother than I’d known before. From the death of her own mother when she was a young child, to riding camels in her outback town aged 12 and a shipboard romance that lasted over 66 years with my father; her life was varied and valued. She leaves behind her a legacy of children and grandchildren who carry her genes and many of her values. We loved and were loved by her, which is where the pain of loss is birthed.

Each person’s life story has its highlights, humour and pain. Although my parents’ romantic courtship and marriage was destined for the London newspaper headlines, (except the King died that day!), it’s not really about fame in the end. Their love story wasn’t always easy and it’s certainly very hard for Dad now, who is peeved to be left behind. But to love and be loved for decades by the same person is certainly to be recommended.

We can never replace Mum – and wouldn’t want to. However, we, her children and grandchildren, are her greatest legacy and therefore an ongoing comfort and source of strength for Dad. I’m sure Mum would be pleased we are around him now, as consideration for those she loved most was a strong value of hers.

Our bodies cease, but our values define our lives and the legacy we leave. That’s providing we live them out in a visible way amidst those around us. Whatever life deals us, we have choices about the way we respond and the people who accompany our journey. Although, Mum’s childhood was a difficult one which scarred her in some ways, she loved and was loved. What greater legacy can there be?
​
‘My children, our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action,’ (from the Bible, 1 John 3:18)

​
 
今天我完成母親的訃文。這是我的痛楚兼權利。如此我更加認識樸素而獨特的母親，由她幼年喪母，於十二歲時在內陸的鄉鎮乘坐駱駝來往，及在船上浪漫地認識父親維持六十六年的愛情；她的生命多變幻而具價值的。她遺下她的基因及眾多的價值給子孫。我們愛她而得回愛，因此失去她是我們痛楚之源。
 
每人的生命故事都有精彩的，幽默的和痛苦的一面。雖然我父母的浪漫追求及婚姻登上倫敦報章的頭條（除了當日英皇的駕崩！），最終不是為了聲名的。他們的愛情故事并不經常輕鬆，而現在對認為遭離棄的父親來說，是絕對困難的。但同一配偶數世紀的愛與被愛當然值得贊許。
 
我的母親是無可替代的 － 就是可能也不會發生。雖然如此，我們，她的子孫，是她最偉大的遺產，是父親的不斷慰籍和力量的根源。我肯定母親見到我們在父親的週圍而感愉快的，正如她的最強價值是關心最愛者。
 
我們肉身的生命停止了，但我們的價值定義了我們的生命，而這遺產會留下來的。當然有賴我們於人群中把它表現在生活裏。生命以任何方式對待我們，我們當有選擇回應的方法及走完該過程的陪同者的。雖然母親於童年的困難留下疤痕，她懂愛與被愛。哪裏能找到更偉大的遺產呢？
 
‘親愛的孩子們，我們不要只在嘴上說彼此相愛，而應該用行動把真理表現出來。’（出自聖經，約翰一書第3章第18節）
…………………………………………………………………………………….
永恒的遗产        （译自Karen牧师的‘Enduring Legacy')
 
今天我完成母亲的讣文。这是我的痛楚兼权利。如此我更加认识朴素而独特的母亲，由她幼年丧母，于十二岁时在内陆的乡镇乘坐骆驼来往，及在船上浪漫地认识父亲维持六十六年的爱情；她的生命多变幻而具价值的。她遗下她的基因及众多的价值给子孙。我们爱她而得回爱，因此失去她是我们痛楚之源。
 
每人的生命故事都有精彩的，幽默的和痛苦的一面。虽然我父母的浪漫追求及婚姻登上伦敦报章的头条（除了当日英皇的驾崩！），最终不是为了声名的。他们的爱情故事并不经常轻松，而现在对认为遭离弃的父亲来说，是绝对困难的。但同一配偶数世纪的爱与被爱当然值得赞许。
 
我的母亲是无可替代的 － 就是可能也不会发生。虽然如此，我们，她的子孙，是她最伟大的遗产，是父亲的不断慰籍和力量的根源。我肯定母亲见到我们在父亲的週围而感愉快的，正如她的最强价值是关心最爱者。
 
我们肉身的生命停止了，但我们的价值定义了我们的生命，而这遗产会留下来的。当然有赖我们于人群中把它表现在生活裏。生命以任何方式对待我们，我们当有选择回应的方法及走完该过程的陪同者的。虽然母亲于童年的困难留下疤痕，她懂爱与被爱。哪裏能找到更伟大的遗产呢？
 
‘亲爱的孩子们，我们不要只在嘴上说彼此相爱，而应该用行动把真理表现出来。’（出自圣经，约翰一书第3章第18节）

As a young child, I would sit on my grandma’s knee and ask to see her ring. How it sparkled with its many diamonds cleverly cut to catch the light! I own that ring now and still delight in its timeless appeal. The jeweller’s skills make these stones remarkable. It is the many facets which give it such beauty.
This is also true of life. As a child develops, their gifts and abilities begin to shine forth. We find they are capable in many different areas, and often it can be difficult knowing which to choose to hone. Outstandingly gifted children can be the focus of much attention and may be capable of shining on their own, but most have gifts they can enjoy contributing to the whole. Each gift is like a facet, reflecting some of the rays that make a beautiful gem.

As adults, we learn that others have gifts we lack and vice versa. When we choose to collaborate, this can be powerful. The emerging Games in the Park held last Sunday afternoons of the month at Helen Street reserve, Lane Cove North, is a good example of this. An initiative of Lane Cove Community Chaplaincy and the Rotary Club of Lane Cove, others quickly joined in. Local groups, a business and neighbours also offered their talents free of charge. This enables far more to be offered to our local community: table tennis, cricket, bowls, volleyball, Frisbee, massage, face painting, orienteering, and a free barbecue are the current activities on a growing list. It’s fun to be part of the team, discovering new facets and new friends.
My experience shows it’s far better to focus on the abilities of others (and my own) than upon the deficits. Encouraging people to find and utilise their gifts is enriching. What facets in your life are waiting to catch the light? Unleash them and we will all be the richer!

‘For it was you (Lord) who formed my inward parts; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made,’ The Bible, Psalm 139: 13-14 (NRSV)

PS You will find a photo of the ring on our Facebook site (6/4/18) and a short video with more story about the ring's significance (5/4/18).