Being a brave mother, I changed our Christmas gift-giving tradition a few years ago! Our children were all in their twenties, and well-supplied with the essentials of life and more. As they have been raised to be ‘givers’, we substituted exchanging presents within our family, for giving gifts to those who really needed them. To be honest, opening a card detailing the gift was less exciting than present opening around our Christmas tree. Although not everyone was keen the first year, we continue this new tradition, believing it represents the meaning of Christmas so much better.

The essential meaning of Christmas is of a loving God becoming human and living amongst us, hence identifying with our humanity completely. This event continues to provide us with a recorded example of Jesus’ life, including bold teachings on how to live justly and compassionately with our fellow humans. We are assured of God’s unconditional love for us, and encouraged to follow the way of life modelled by Jesus. Some people choose to do this very consciously. Others, less so, but often their lives show similar compassion towards others, offering hope and support to them when systems lack justice.

Everyone is welcome to come into churches or join the celebration at Christmas carols. While each gathering is slightly different, a time of joy and celebration it will be. Lane Cove Uniting Church would happily welcome you on Christmas Day at 9.30 am, corner Figtree St and Centennial Ave, Lane Cove.

If you aren’t keen on church, but would like to celebrate Christmas by rectifying some of the world’s inequalities, join me in utilising the Everything in Common Ethical Gift catalogue https://everythingincommon.com.au/  to purchase some thoughtful gifts.

After all, life is a precious gift worth celebrating!

Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift! (from The Bible, 2 Corinthians 9:15 NIV)

身為勇敢的母親，我於數年前改了聖誕節送禮物的傳統方式！我們的孩子們二十多歲了，不缺乏生活所需甚至有餘。於是我們家裏把這交換禮物的方式改了，變為把禮物送給有需要者。老實地說，張開一面列出禮物的聖誕卡片來看，感覺是比圍著聖誕樹出示禮物失色的。雖然首次有人不習慣，我們依然堅持這新傳統，信念是這樣子更能代表聖誕的意義。
 
聖誕的基本意義是具愛心的上神化為人類，跟我們一起生活，認同無差別的人性。這事件一直供給我們基督化生活模範的紀錄，包括無畏強權的教導，我們如何維持正義和具同情心跟週遭的人一起生活。我們得保證享受上神無保留的愛，鼓勵跟隨基督化生活的模範。有些人較認真，有些人較差點，但通常他們於生活中相互感應同情，一旦當權機構欠公正時寄予希望及支持。
 
你們到各教堂的聖誕節慶祝和唱聖詩是受歡迎的。雖然各教堂的聚會型式略有不同，但普天同慶是無異的。Lane Cove Uniting Church合一教堂歡迎你們於聖誕日光臨，時間為上午9時30分，地點為Figtree Street和Centennial Avenue交界。
 
假如你們對上教堂沒興趣，但意想糾正世界的不公義來慶祝這節日，請上‘Everything in Common Ethical Gift catalogue https://everythingincommon.com.au/  ’購買支持公道禮物。
 
話得說回來，生活已經是值得慶祝的禮物！
 
感謝上神，這恩賜實在奇妙，難以用言語表達！（出自聖經哥林多人後書第9章15節）
……………………….
是施予的时候了             （译自Karen 牧師的《A Time to Give》）
 
身为勇敢的母亲，我于数年前改了圣诞节送礼物的传统方式！我们的孩子二十多岁了，不缺乏生活所需甚至有馀。于是我们家裏把这交换礼物的方式改了，变为把礼物送给有需要者。老实地说，张开一面列出礼物的圣诞卡片来看，感觉是比围着圣诞树出示礼物失色的。虽然首次有人不习惯，我们依然坚持这新传统，信念是这样子更能代表圣诞的意义。
 
圣诞的基本意义是具爱心的上神化为人类，跟我们一起生活，认同无差别的人性。这事件一直供给我们基督化生活模范的纪录，包括无畏强权的教导，我们如何维持正义和具同情心跟週遭的人一起生活。我们得保证享受上神无保留的爱，鼓励跟随基督化生活的模范。有些人较认真，有些人较差点，但通常他们于生活中相互感应同情，一旦当权机构欠公正时寄予希望及支持。
 
你们到各教堂的圣诞节庆祝和唱圣诗是受欢迎的。虽然各教堂的聚会型式略有不同，但普天同庆是无异的。Lane Cove Uniting Church合一教堂欢迎你们于圣诞日光临，时间为上午9时30分，地点为Figtree Street和Centennial Avenue交界。
 
假如你们对上教堂没兴趣，但意想纠正世界的不公义来庆祝这节日，请上‘Everything in Common Ethical Gift catalogue https://everythingincommon.com.au/  ’购买支持公道礼物。

‘And the winner of most items in their handbag is…Karen!’ My embarrassing ‘win’ was many years ago now, but was symptomatic of a tendency to be over-prepared. Although my handbag is lighter these days, unnecessary details and decisions can occupy too much of my time and energy. ‘Your mind never stops’, is my husband’s lament. Not that it’s wrong to consider options, but sometimes we can waste time on trivial matters.

Good decisions about important matters, however, are pivotal to the quality of our existence. Making good choices requires careful evaluation of the factors involved. Which important questions will guide us? This is where our value system clicks in. Our inherited world view is an important factor, but it is ours to accept or reject at every turn.

Advertising sends us a constant message that it’s all about satisfying our needs and our desires. Don’t be fooled by this assumption. It should not be exclusively about our personal gain, or that of those closest to us, all the time. This approach is not even good for the individual, let alone others!
Community is about what is best for all of us. Looking beyond ourselves produces a by-product of satisfaction and a reduction in anxiety. Hugh Mackay’s latest book informs us:

      '…belonging to a community keeps us in touch with people who might need us, and nothing  relieves anxiety like a focus on someone else’s needs… it is the exercise of compassion – not merely the experience of belonging – that is the great antidote to anxiety. (p. 65 Australia Reimagined. Towards a more compassionate, less anxious society).'

So next time we are faced with an important decision, let us buck the ‘me first’ trend mainly encouraged by advertising media. Instead, lifting our gaze to consider and include those around us – our community – gives us the opportunity to build bonds and contribute to something bigger than ourselves. Our Hugh Mackay Book Club discusses our response to issues such as these. Contact me to join us.

​​“而手袋容物最多這項的得獎者是........Karen！”我的尷尬‘獎品’已是多年前的事了，卻是過分注意細節的徵狀。雖然近日我的手袋輕了，但無謂事和決策竟然消耗太多時間和體力。“你總是不停地用腦的，”為外子的抱怨。推敲選擇是無可厚非的，但有時我們可能耗時於鎖碎的事物。
 
雖然如此，對重要事情作良好決定是我們存在的關鍵。良好的選擇需要深思熟慮所涉及的因素的。哪類重要問題會指導我們呢？於是我們的價值系統就出來了。祖宗傳下來的世界是重要因素之一，但每一轉折的接受與否由於我們自己。
 
商業廣告經常推出訊息，一切都是為了滿足需要和欲望。請勿給這假設誤導了。關鍵絕不單在我們個人或親人永遠地獲利。這著手法簡值對個人不利，何況其他大眾！
 
社會就是我們最好的選擇。把目光投射於身外會獲得附加的滿足和減少憂慮的。Hugh Mackay最近的著作表示：
 
........歸屬一個社會讓我們接觸到或許需要我們幫助的人，而沒有其他方法消除憂慮相比聚焦於解決他人的需要........實行同情心 － 不僅經驗歸屬 － 這就是憂慮的偉大解藥。（《Australia Reimagined. Towards a more compassionate, less anxious society澳洲察新形象。趨向一個更具同情心，減少憂慮的社會》第65頁).
因此下次我們遭遇一個重要決擇時，要推開給廣告媒體鼓勵的‘讓我先行’的風氣。相反，要放眼於外，容入他人－我們的社會－讓我們有機會建立連系從而供獻比為己更偉大的事情。我們的Hugh Mackay Club 讀者會討論和回答以上這類問題的。有興趣參加者請跟我聯絡。
………………………………………………….
良好的选择        （译自Karen牧师的‘Good Choices')
 
“而手袋容物最多这项的得奖者是........Karen！”我的尴尬‘奖品’已是多年前的事了，却是过分注意细节的征状。虽然近日我的手袋轻了，但无谓事和决策竟然消耗太多时间和体力。“你总是不停地用脑的，”为外子的抱怨。推敲选择是无可厚非的，但有时我们可能耗时于锁碎的事物。
 
虽然如此，对重要事情作良好决定是我们存在的关键。良好的选择需要深思熟慮所涉及的因素的。哪类重要问题会指导我们呢？于是我们的价值系统就出来了。祖宗传下来的世界是重要因素之一，但每一转折的接受与否由于我们自己。
 
商业广告经常推出讯息，一切都是为了满足需要和欲望。请勿给这假设误导了。关键绝不单在我们个人或亲人永远地获利。这着手法简值对个人不利，何况其他大众！
 
社会就是我们最好的选择。把目光投射于身外会获得附加的满足和减少忧慮的。Hugh Mackay最近的著作表示∶
 
........归属一个社会让我们接触到或许需要我们帮助的人，而没有其他方法消除忧慮相比聚焦于解决他人的需要........实行同情心 － 不仅经验归属 － 这就是忧酝的伟大解药。（《Australia Reimagined. Towards a more compassionate, less anxious society澳洲察新形象。趋向一个更具同情心，减少忧慮的社会》第65页).
因此下次我们遭遇一个重要决择时，要推开给广告媒体鼓励的‘让我先行’的风气。相反，要放眼于外，容入他人－我们的社会－让我们有机会建立连系从而供献比为己更伟大的事情。我们的Hugh Mackay Club 读者会讨论和回答以上这类问题的。有兴趣参加者请跟我联络。

Our immediate family gathered around a seaside table enjoying good food, beautiful sunshine and each other’s company. It was an ordinary, but special moment to treasure. Everyone was doing well, hopeful for their future, generous and kind with each other. I smiled inside – I felt proud of our young adult children - and revelled in their current satisfaction with life, as mothers do. 

It was special because it is so rarely this way. Usually someone is going through a rough patch or the harmony between us is not so strong. Life is like that, a constant series of ups and downs. What we do with this rhythm is so important. We have tried to help our children be resilient, to accept what life throws at them and learn from it, integrating that wisdom into their lives for the future. I saw a heartening glimpse of that reality on this occasion.

One ‘child’ enquired what aspirations I had for them as they grew up. Whereas my expectations have adjusted over time, the basics remain consistent:

• To find out who they are and be true to that. (Career-wise we have an electrician, a farm manager and a youth/aid worker!)
• To change the world in positive ways.
• To love one another and those around them.
• To love God and follow their calling.
• To be satisfied with their lives.

As a Community Chaplain, I now extend my heart to all those who seek nurture, especially in tough times. I go easy on the God factor, although I believe this is foundational to integrating life well. Creating groups where people can meet and foster ongoing friendships is now a key focus. Kindness, respect and inclusion are core values of these diverse groups. You are invited to come along, or encourage someone else who may benefit from a little kindness in their lives. Submit an enquiry form to find out more details.

我們陪著近親一起圍坐在海邊擺設的桌子，一邊欣賞美食，一邊享受陽光和共聚的溫罄。這是平凡的，但值得珍惜的一段特別時光。我們各人都健康，充滿未來的希望并無私地互愛。我的內心微笑著 — 我為這些年青的成年子女感到驕傲，并像一般母親般，見到他們生活滿足而感到鼓舞。
 
這會子是特別的，因為不常有。通常總有人不如意或感情不甚和諧的。生活就是如此，它經常具波動性的,迎合這節奏的方法極為重要。我們嘗試幫助子女從新振作，接受逆境來領略教訓，融合這份智慧用於將來。當時的情境令我感動，覺得一線希望的實現。
 
我的‘孩子’之一問我，對他們長成後有什麼抱負。我的希冀由於歲月的磨合而給修正了，基本上卻并無變化的：
 
●讓他們找到自我，堅守誠心。（在職業而言，他們中有電工、農場管理和青年輔導員！）
●正面地改善世界。
●互愛并把愛施於他人。
●愛上神并接受祂的召喚。
●找到生活的滿足。
 
身為社區教士，我願意張開懷抱迎接你們中尋求生活滋養者，尤其是那些處於困難的人。我不著重上神因素（不滔滔說理），雖然我相信這是融入生活的基礎。我主要是創立團契，讓參與者會面和培養友誼。仁愛、尊重和包涵就是這綜合團體的中心價值。我邀請你們光臨，或鼓勵於生活上需要點善意者參與。請打電話，或依以下連接查詢。


我的希望                                           （译自Karen牧师的“I Wish")
我们陪着近亲一起围坐在海边摆设的桌子，一边欣赏美食，一边享受阳光和共聚的温罄。这是平凡的，但值得珍惜的一段特别时光。我们各人都健康，充满未来的希望并无私地互爱。我的内心微笑着 -- 我为这些年青的成年子女感到骄傲，并像一般母亲般，见到他们生活满足而感到鼓舞。 
这会子是特别的，因为不常有。通常总有人不如意或感情不甚和谐的。生活就是如此，它经常具波动性的, 迎合这节奏的方法极为重要。我们尝试帮助子女从新振作，接受逆境来领略教训，融合这份智慧用于将来。当时的情境令我感动，觉得一线希望的实现。 
我的‘孩子’之一问我，对他们长成后有什麽抱负。我的希冀由于岁月的磨合而给修正了，基本上却并无变化的∶ 

• 让他们找到自我，坚守诚心。（在职业而言，他们中有电工丶农场管理和青年辅导员！）
• 正面地改善世界。
• 互爱并把爱施于他人。
• 爱上神并接受祂的召唤。
• 找到生活的满足。

 身为社区教士，我愿意张开怀抱迎接你们中寻求生活滋养者，尤其是那些处于困难的人。我不着重上神因素（不滔滔说理），虽然我相信这是融入生活的基础。我主要是创立团契，让参与者会面和培养友谊。仁爱丶尊重和包涵就是这综合团体的中心价值。我邀请你们光临，或鼓励于生活上需要点善意者参与。请打电话，或依以下连接查询。



我们陪着近亲一起围坐在海边摆设的桌子，一边欣赏美食，一边享受阳光和共聚的温罄。这是平凡的，但值得珍惜的一段特别时光。我们各人都健康，充满未来的希望并无私地互爱。我的内心微笑着 -- 我为这些年青的成年子女感到骄傲，并像一般母亲般，见到他们生活满足而感到鼓舞。
 
这会子是特别的，因为不常有。通常总有人不如意或感情不甚和谐的。生活就是如此，它经常具波动性的, 迎合这节奏的方法极为重要。我们尝试帮助子女从新振作，接受逆境来领略教训，融合这份智慧用于将来。当时的情境令我感动，觉得一线希望的实现。
 
我的‘孩子’之一问我，对他们长成后有什麽抱负。我的希冀由于岁月的磨合而给修正了，基本上却并无变化的∶
 
●让他们找到自我，坚守诚心。（在职业而言，他们中有电工丶农场管理和青年辅导员！）
●正面地改善世界。
●互爱并把爱施于他人。
●爱上神并接受祂的召唤。
●找到生活的满足。
 
身为社区教士，我愿意张开怀抱迎接你们中寻求生活滋养者，尤其是那些处于困难的人。我不着重上神因素（不滔滔说理），虽然我相信这是融入生活的基础。我主要是创立团契，让参与者会面和培养友谊。仁爱丶尊重和包涵就是这综合团体的中心价值。我邀请你们光临，或鼓励于生活上需要点善意者参与。请打电话，或依以下连接查询。

​I am so relieved! Someone close to me has finally succeeded in finding a new job, away from a bullying boss. It’s so difficult when someone in authority decides to abuse their power over you, as it is easily assumed that those with greater power also tell the greater truth! Hence, they can block your path out, enabling ongoing abuse. This situation repeats itself over and over, from the school yard to our homes, places of employment to the nations. Bullies are amazingly good at couching their behaviour, and they hone in on vulnerability. Sometimes they appear unaware of the devastating effects of their actions, although many clearly delight in the pain they cause others. This makes my blood boil!

Intervention by authorities usually depends on evidence, or at least some credible witnesses. Our Australian culture of mateship can help here. Who do you know that is being bullied? Can you assist them directly by speaking the truth to those who have decision-making power? That makes you an everyday hero! Or you may be a source of strength for them merely by coming alongside and believing in them – being a good mate by refusing to side with the powerful. Your encouragement could give them confidence to eventually stand against the bully. Your words and actions have power too!

Are we complicit in yielding to the ‘loudest’ voices? Let us look beyond persuasive personalities to evidence-based research and a good reputation of credible service. It is also wise to weigh whether the dominant person is telling us the truth, especially when the weaker one asserts otherwise. It is important to take time to unearth the truth when peoples’ lives are at stake.
​
I like what Jesus said to his mates about leadership and power:
‘But it shall not be this way among you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant’. (The Bible, Mark 10:43).

I wrote my mum’s eulogy today. It was both pain and privilege. I learned more about my modest and private mother than I’d known before. From the death of her own mother when she was a young child, to riding camels in her outback town aged 12 and a shipboard romance that lasted over 66 years with my father; her life was varied and valued. She leaves behind her a legacy of children and grandchildren who carry her genes and many of her values. We loved and were loved by her, which is where the pain of loss is birthed.

Each person’s life story has its highlights, humour and pain. Although my parents’ romantic courtship and marriage was destined for the London newspaper headlines, (except the King died that day!), it’s not really about fame in the end. Their love story wasn’t always easy and it’s certainly very hard for Dad now, who is peeved to be left behind. But to love and be loved for decades by the same person is certainly to be recommended.

We can never replace Mum – and wouldn’t want to. However, we, her children and grandchildren, are her greatest legacy and therefore an ongoing comfort and source of strength for Dad. I’m sure Mum would be pleased we are around him now, as consideration for those she loved most was a strong value of hers.

Our bodies cease, but our values define our lives and the legacy we leave. That’s providing we live them out in a visible way amidst those around us. Whatever life deals us, we have choices about the way we respond and the people who accompany our journey. Although, Mum’s childhood was a difficult one which scarred her in some ways, she loved and was loved. What greater legacy can there be?
​
‘My children, our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action,’ (from the Bible, 1 John 3:18)